how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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