i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
