btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
