I saw his package. It spoke to me.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Randomize
