Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
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