Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
