I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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