Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Randomize
