just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Randomize
