my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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