So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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