Pregnant stripper...not hot.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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