so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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