if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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