you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
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