She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
