so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Randomize
