They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
