Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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