So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
