She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Is Oprah even human
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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