We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
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