I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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