Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Randomize
