Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
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