Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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