do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Randomize
