Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
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I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
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im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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