I can text with my tongue
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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