You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize