Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
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