Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
She's the barista slut.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
He shit in the fireplace
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Randomize
