Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
