I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
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