12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good