Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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