What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Randomize
