just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
He better not be in your backpack
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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