Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
