So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
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