Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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