ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
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