hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
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