dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
