you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
