soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
worst night to have a conscience
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize