Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Pappa wants mamma naked
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize
