I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
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