Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
My ATM looks so different sober.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
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