How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
